Friday, February 04, 2011

When the dad's away ...

Some of you will know that hubs has been away for the last 3 weeks. Yup. That's right. Three long weeks. (School stuff, master's degree, blahdeblah ... now back to me ...)

I was pretty freaked out about him going away for so long and leaving me with sole parental responsibility 24/7/21. Plus, I don't get to stick with our regular visitation schedule with the Teenager when his Dad is away. So I've only seen my big guy once, for one night, in the last three weeks. He had exams, so he was busy too (studying with the adoring Little Boo around would not have worked well).

There's been a definite downside.

I also have missed a whole bunch of events and networking opportunities and business meetings while I've had no tag-team support. I'm trying not to think about those.

Because, ya know what? It's actually been a pretty freaking good three weeks. (Shh! don't tell Hubs!)

Little Boo and I have settled into a good routine and he's been super helpful and mostly cooperative. Grocery Gateway has kept us fed & drive-thru bank machines have kept us solvent, (Seriously, have you met my kid? I can't take him anywhere.)  We've had some playdates & have gone out to lunch together. He helped me deliver my Avon brochures. He taught me how to set up the Wii and play it. (yes, he's 5) And there's been lots of fires in the fireplace and cuddling and movies. A big highlight was going to Big Al's Aquarium store to watch them feed the sharks. We got some new fish and snails too, and Little Boo has been doing a great job feeding them each day. Plus, he is now an expert in Skyping as we've talked to Daddy every night.

There's also a series of things I've noticed that have made my life a little easier since hubs left. It turns out that I do an awful lot of looking after him too. For one thing, although I appreciate the amount of cooking he does, he is really quite a messy cook. My kitchen has never been cleaner. And I have filled only two ice cube trays in the course of three weeks. A huge improvement over the one each morning that I normally have to fill, when I find it sitting empty on the counter. (It's for ice water, honest.) And toilet paper? Well, he and the teenager apparently use an ungodly amount.  I've hardly had to change the rolls at all and have of course never found an empty roll on the holder while a half used one sits on the counter.

No disagreements over the TV or the music in the car. I haven't had to readjust the driver's seat the whole time. And my bed? Well, I've been sharing it with the 5yo, and he is so much easier to sleep with. Takes up way less room, doesn't snore, and the covers are basically in the same place in the morning when we wake up as they were when we went to bed.


Tomorrow my brief adventure in single parenthood comes to an end. I get the Teenager in the afternoon and Hubs comes home around bedtime. We will be a family of four again, at least until Monday morning. I already have a bunch of plans that involve me being childfree and socialising with adults.

We'll slip back into our messy, busy, loud routine, but at least we'll all be together again.


  1. The recipe is very hard and is easily forgotten for ice in my house too. You mean the toilet paper is supposed to go on the holder, it's not decoration? :) Glad you survived the 3 weeks. I'm sure having an end date helped too.

  2. For sure knowing this was a temporary situation with a definite end made it a lot easier. I certainly don't mean to compare my three weeks to the reality of being a true single mom.

  3. I am going through something very similiar. My hubbie changed shifts so he is working afternoons Mon-Thurs and days on Fridays till May.
    At first I thought wow I am going to be missing out on some things, social opportunities but really it hasnt been that bad. I find in the winter there are not as many opportunities.
    It has pushed me in the right direction I have started planning meals, cooking more homemade meals and trying out new recipes.
    I love the quiet time of cuddling and reading with my daughter or I mean her reading and myself reading. We have spent so much more time together on our own and shhh.. just like you it has been okay.
    I sure hope to see you soon !!!!!!!!!!!!

  4. Thanks for the comment Diane! It is pretty nice having this one-on-one time isn't it? The little guy and I have been eating a lot better as well, and not ordering out as much as we do with hubs home.

    My neighbour's hubs just changed from afternoons to days, and she's going nuts with him around so much :-) She had a great routine going with the kids and now it's shot. LOL They are working out their "new normal."


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